October 2011
1 post
3 tags
September 2011
2 posts
I can’t do it ok? I can’t pretend like I’m a normal sane person who can be in some happy relationship. I can’t. I just realized the other day that, and I’m completely serious about this, I want to hurt the people I think I love! Like, what does that even mean? Part of me just wants to rip out a heart and stomp on it until it blends with the gravel. I want to be the...
Important Announcement
If you ran for like, a minute, it doesn’t make you a runner.
August 2011
1 post
drink your juice.: Had a Real New York Moment™... →
drinkyourjuice:
[exiting the subway] Some teenager: Hey sexy.
[ten feet out of the subway station] Guy in his 30s: Have a good night, beautiful.
[rounding the corner to my block] Some old dude: Smile, precious. Show them pretty teeth. Me: Oh FUCK you.
I don’t tend to read a ton of feminist stuff on the…
April 2011
1 post
It’s like when you spot a cutie on Facebook and you’re checking out their interests, and then you see it..
“Republican Party/Conservative”
:( Infinite sads.
March 2011
6 posts
“I would break up that marriage in a heartbeat”
– me, to myself while facebook stalking over lunch :(
Everything she learns I’ve already known. So much wasted space on all these useless details. I wish I could get rid of the knowledge of you inside and out. I will never need to know what makes you happy or what makes you sad again. But it kills me that she gets to know all my favorite things about you. She gets to discover the better sides of you that no one else ever had a chance to see.
I’m so bitter today that I’m actually HOPING I run into any one of my ex-boyfriends. I HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO YELL AT YOU.
I guess I’ll be getting my period soon.
February 2011
4 posts
“I heard that you’re settled down, that you found a girl and you’re...”
– Adele, Someone Like You
Today is one of those days that I try to remember reasons not to drive off a cliff but I come up with nothing. Today I’m just best at missing you.
I’m sitting at my desk, stapling and hole-punching away, when wham. All of a sudden I’m wondering how many times you look at her and think of me. I wonder if she ever says things I used to say. How often does she make you crazy-laugh...
On a lighter note
Do you ever think about how long it would take for someone to notice if you died?
January 2011
25 posts
You would think I’d know better than to eat anything while watching Bones.
One of "those" posts
Every month I’m absolutely amused beyond belief at my emotional state right before my period. It’s freakishly accurate, and somehow it always takes me by surprise. Like duh, thats why I’ve been hysterically crying for hours just because I saw two people holding hands! Or because my single friend has a boyfriend now. Or because I remembered I’m allergic to cats.
I’m...
Stubborn
When my thoughts get kind of psycho I imagine writing up a legal document banning certain people from my funeral. I feel like that’s the ultimate revenge.
“fuck you from the grave. xoxo.”
Morning
I woke up this morning to an empty house. I’m not a very nice person any morning but I was particularly upset today. So yeah, maybe I yelled “fuckin stupid ass pants” or “are you mother fucking kidding me” and other various phrases a few times when i was getting ready or whatever. No big deal. Also I changed and dried my hair with all the doors open cause why not. But As I’m running out the door,...
All I care about right now is my bed and this bag of snyder’s tortilla chips.
Its funny how some of your favorite songs turn into your least favorite when they remind you of that 4th of July you spent swimming at the beach and laying under the fireworks. And now that song reminds you of crying.
Regret breaks even the most stubborn person.
Girl, sometimes you gotta have no shame and sing along to Kelly Clarkson songs at the top of your lungs. Who cares?
Sometimes when I feel particularly lonely, I remind myself that I never have to:
• suffer through another eyeroll-inducing, fraternity-humored, fake tits & masturbation joke of a movie
• clean dried globs of toothpaste and beard hairs from the sink and yellow urine stains from the FLOOR
• give an endless number of blowjobs (for the time being.. get real)
• grind my teeth through a...
Birthdays and ex-boyfriends are complex situations.There is one day out of the year that will undoubtably make you think about an old lover and that day is their birthday.
For whatever reason, even IF they aren’t your facebook friend anymore, your brain will never let you forget this one specific date. They basically own all stock for that day every year. And the birthday is a telling day....
Listen
It’s true that people are attracted to happiness. Stop being so hard on yourself and start appreciating your good qualities. Learn to laugh at everything. Let go of your regrets and start embracing the present. When you love yourself, other people will also see you as someone special.
I’m not going to lie, I’m the worst at approaching anyone I’m attracted to. It’s for that reason that I hope my future husband is at least somewhat of a go-getter. Because even if I’m desperately infatuated with him and secretly hope it’s his shift every time I walk to the corner store by my house and maybe do my hair just in case I see him, there’s not a...
2 tags
Mom: Are you going somewhere?
Me: No, why?
Mom: You have pants on.
1 tag
1 tag
“I could say that I’ll always be here for you, but that would be a lie and...”
Just curious?
Why would you take a paper from the printer that wasn’t yours? Like um, oops I thought I was the one who took 25 minutes looking up and typing out that list of names I just printed. Oh well, go ahead and scribble all over it and use it as your own. It’s fine!
Listen
December 2010
7 posts
I have an irrational fear of Asthma. Or being buried alive in a coffin. Just not being able to catch my breath altogether.. I mean, really?? What could ever be worse than that? Asthmatic people are troopers. End of story.
1 tag
November 2010
2 posts
All men are more appealing when their hearts are being ripped out of their chests.
“I saw you just the other day. Those feelings never went away. I smiled.”
October 2010
15 posts
1 tag
You can’t really be that upset over a break-up if you made off with a ton of large comfy shirts.